Viewing entries tagged
last minute wedding details

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We all have regrets - three mistakes that brides can sometimes make

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Oh man, I regret…

 How many times have you said that? Hindsight being twenty/twenty and all that, we end up saying this too many times. And sometimes it is something simple that we can just brush off and mark it in our “never to repeat” experiences. But how destructive this would be when planning a wedding?

Expounding on last week’s blog about the importance of learning about your financial mindset and creating a budget, we will talk about certain experiences that real brides have had planning their wedding and things that they ended up saying “I regret” about. If you’re wondering how this links with budgeting and finance, stay with me.

Overspending on the wedding dress

Here is one that is heard a lot – “I shouldn’t have spent so much on my dress. I only wore it once and now that is money I’m not able to use (insert monthly expense here)”. Think about it. Now, disclaimer. I’m a firm believer of you finding your dream dress that will make a statement. It is your day, why not make several statements? Just consider that if you’re going to splurge on your dress, having a budget is a great visual reminder. What is that reminder saying? If you are going to spend nearly $3,000 on a dress, then you have to cut funding from another category to be able to afford it.

Not hiring a wedding planner

Another that brides have said that they regretted is not allocating funds to hire a wedding planner. A lot of times venues provide venue coordinators. Let me be the first to let you know unless they say “wedding coordinator”, expect to only receive help with areas that pertain to the wedding venue. Some venue coordinators are really helpful and do liaise with vendors that will be involved with the wedding. However, (the majority of the time) it is primarily with their preferred vendors (which you could be paying a premium price for).

There’s a marked difference between and venue coordinator and a wedding planner or day of wedding coordinator.  These brides have said that they regretted not hiring a coordinator because they were not able to enjoy their wedding day, having to manage vendors, contracts and guests. So essentially, they spent most of their wedding day in a blur. 

A wedding planner or coordinator is there to manage the background chaos that occurs on the wedding day. More like a mediator and personal adviser that navigates you through the day, ensuring that you are present in every moment. This again should be budgeted, because think about it, do you really want to spend your day managing and worrying about everything that can go wrong? Or do you want to be in the moment when you’re pronounced husband and wife so you can be excited about your first kiss as Mr and Mrs?

Not making enough time for each other

The final regret I’d like to share today is “not setting enough time aside before the wedding for each other”. Planning a wedding is stressful. With help, it can be less so. Although sometimes relationships have been known to be ruined during the wedding planning process. It is very important to set aside time for yourself and your soon to be fiancé before the wedding. This time will allow you to collect your thoughts and have a safe space that does not involve any wedding planning anything. Don’t become caught up in the phase, because the wedding day is only the first stop on the journey to forever. Budgeting is essential here too because if everything is locked into the wedding, where is the “get to grow with each other” time? You used to date each other before the proposal and the talks of marriage. Maybe it wasn’t always the fancy restaurants, maybe sometimes it was an apple pie from McDonalds, or maybe it was ice cream in the park. Budgeting a miscellaneous expense would compensate for the times when you both just need a break from the crazy, and to be able to take the time and just love on each other. Maybe this calls for a weekend where you get away or a stay-cation involving Netflix and some popcorn. Make time for fun with each other.

Hope these tidbits encourages you to try to live with no regrets and to set you up for success. Every decision that you make always has a consequence, and that applies to weddings too. There are lots more regrets that various brides have, what advice or thoughts have you come up against that you would like to share?

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A little detail often forgotten.. or a MAJOR factor?

Ladies, you may be wondering what “little” wedding detail today’s post is going to be about. Guess what, it is little. It is something that is often forgotten to be exact. What is it?  The “reserved” sign.

Okay, so I made this big lead up and came to you with a “reserved” sign. You might be wondering, where is she going with this. Why such drama around a reserved sign? Let me tell you a little story of a wedding we worked.

There were eighty invited guests including the bridal party. Seems very straightforward and simple right? Wrong. The original guest list was one hundred fifty and due to unforeseen circumstances, the guest list had to be cut. This was no easy fete. With large families on both sides, it was very hard to come to eighty guests. After much work and evaluation, eighty guests were selected and notified that they were the chosen lucky ones. Hooray, all is well in the world.

But, disaster was on the horizon. Come wedding day, one hundred guests were invited to the ceremony, of which one hundred and fifteen showed up. Now, you may think I am exaggerating – as this would be a planner’s nightmare, after all. But, I kid you not. There were one hundred fifteen guests. Yes, you might have guessed, some of said one hundred invitees, brought a plus one (which was not allowed per the invitation, but that is for another time – stay tuned for “Invitation drama”).

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We are not allowed to panic, we are planners, the stress handlers for the day. No worries at all, we got this. We formulated a plan and stuck to it. Several of the guests got angry (a planner’s nightmare, because guests are to always be happy at a wedding, right? That is our main goal, right?)

A planner’s job is quite tough because the main priority is to adhere to the bride and groom’s wishes. Those wishes, (I am coming full circle, stay with me), were to have eighty guests attend the reception. So,  guests being upset that they are not able to bring the plus one, and deciding to leave was what ended up happening. We had a checklist to go by, and if you weren’t on the list, you had to go -

*Hasta Luego, See ya, Bye-Bye*.

Sad, but true. We made it through the list with a few special guests that the bride or groom really wanted to stay. But Y'all. And here is my full circle. The tables were not numbered. And there were NO reserved signs.

CHAOS everywhere. Where will the family sit? Who is to be near to the bridal party? Where will the persons who are about going to sit?

*Hair pulling, Frantic, Breathless*

 At least, that was what was in my head. Outside I was the picture of serenity. A wedding planner never loses her cool *HELLO*

 Several guests had decided to seat themselves as we were sorting out the checklists and had to be asked to move to accommodate the family, and were later seated after the bridal party and the important persons that were giving the toasts were seated.

*Phew*

Okay, so that was the story, but, Y'all. Long story short. A lot of that drama and headache could have been avoided with a few table numbers and some reserved cards. Early during the planning process, this was all there. A seating chart, table numbers, and a designated family table. Planning can be so hectic that this can sometimes get lost, and it seems like no small matter. The sad truth is that it can be a big issue.

 As of that day, reserved signs are one of the first things that go in my emergency kit. We now know how to prevent chaos from happening by reserving the family’s seats and asking the maid of honor of all the important persons that should be seated close to the family. They are all now seated before the remaining guests, who can then choose their own seating.

Reserved signs Y'all. A small but mighty planning tool that can help the wedding reception be absolutely amazing or utterly chaotic. A lesson well learned, and now we are always prepared, and you should be too. Don’t push the seating chart to the last week of the wedding, if you feel that you are running out of time, have a designated friend that is good at organizing to help you. But if you absolutely ran out of time…With us?  No seating chart? NO problem.

*Pulls out reserved signs*

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